Day 95 Sept 14 another exciting day of graveyard shift!
Day 96 Sept 15 I am 29 years old. While working on my grave shift, I decided to journal. I had learned earlier in the evening that when I have no opinion one way or another about something it is because I am lacking information. At the beginning of my journal I started with I have no opinion one way or another about this birthday. Then following my earlier discovery decided to look at my 29 trips around the sun on this planet, and felt younger than I have in a while. I realized there were a lot of bad things that have happened and that made me feel not so good, but then I took at look at all the things I have accomplished, and was feeling very incredibly amazed at my life, and was filled with the knowledge that I've done a good job of living it to it's fullest, especially in the last few years being inspired with an intense motivation to make every day count! I also took a look at where I imagined myself to be in relation to where I was. What I discovered is there's still some unchased dreams in my life and made a commitment to myself to follow those in the next few years of my life. The big one being living in my own little studio in New York and working in theater. Big wide world watch out, I've got thoughts, ideas, goals that will work there way into plans!
After work, I couldn't sleep so I watched tv for a few hours, till I was finally tired enough to lay down. I slept for 4 hours, then headed to work for a meeting. I stopped at Baskin Robbins along the way and ordered my cake for the party. I am very excited about my cake. I went to the work meeting, and was suddenly feeling awake and not ready to go back to the house and to bed. So I took myself to see Eat, Pray, Love, which I thought was playing at the theater in town but after getting there I realized was not, so I drove back out to Albuquerque because I just wasn't ready to call it a night. I'm glad I did, because the movie was good, then I was tired and ready to go to bed. I did, but didn't get much sleep and awoke very early this morning.
Day 97 Sept 16. I've been up since 7:30am. I did some laundry, to have a clean work shirt. I called ventura county public records in search of information on my half-sister or her mother to try and locate them. I don't know that I really want out of meeting her, but I have this overwhelming sense of wanting to know her, so I am following that sense. Then I had a nice talk with my sponsor, after which my mom and I talked for a little over a half hour. Then we looked at the guest house and saw its progress and talked about the things that still need doing, etc. Then played ball with the dogs, and have been watching tv and passing some time until work. Which now it's time to get ready and head out. I am soooo tired that hopefully when I come home I can crash.
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